Why There Shouldn't Be an Argument About Women's Ordination

For about a year now, I have "come out" as a woman who believes women should be ordained to the priesthood.

Since then, I have been called apostate by those who barely know anything more about me than my first and last name. I've been accused of following satan by people who I wouldn't even consider good enough friends to chat with them in a grocery store. I've even had my beliefs called abhorrent by extended family members.

Luckily, the people who really know and care about me remain unfazed at my position, and have even become my biggest advocates and supporters. People like my dad, who had nearly graduated from law school before women were allowed to pray in sacrament meeting, will chat with me on the regular about how women's future in the church is expanding, without once calling me to repentance. I'm lucky enough to have fabulous ward leadership who realize that the church isn't limited to the structure that it currently has. And most importantly, I married the best person in the world and he is always there to rant and rave with me, and he even stood in line with me for tickets to the priesthood session last October. Seriously. Help me find a flaw in that boy.

So while I understand that there will be differing opinions on the topic, debating the issue with people who don't really know me outside of my online persona has been frustrating. To say the least. Mainly because I think any Facebook comment that is longer than a couple paragraphs (and don't even get me started on the impassable wall of text that doesn't get broken into paragraphs) is not only unwieldy, but tends to make one look rather insane.

To fix that, I decided to write up my rebuttals to some of the common "arguments" I have heard from people on Facebook so that I can just refer them to this link. Or you, if that is how you got here.

"Women don't need the priesthood, they have motherhood."

This is, by far, the most popular "come-back" people have about women's ordination. Which surprises me, since it is also one of the most illogical.

Now don't get me wrong, I know motherhood is great. You might not think I know that because I have been married nearly three years and don't have any children. Also, I'm in law school which must mean I'm one of those dreaded "career women." I truly believe that your family situation (babies, career, etc.) should be a decision between you, your spouse, and the Lord. That being said, Jason and I have been "trying" to have kids for over two and a half years now. Boom, roasted.

But the reason why this argument is so illogical is that fathers have fatherhood and the priesthood. Which is why having the priesthood wouldn't detract from motherhood, but add to it. To say otherwise is to demean men's role in the family. And since I don't believe Heavenly Mother's role is more important than Heavenly Father's, I think They would want us to learn co-parenting while we are here on earth. You can read more about my position on that here.

"The Church can't change doctrine, only policy."

This one always makes me sigh. I'm not exactly sure when this doctrine/policy distinction came about, but I think it is damaging and completely in conflict with the 9th Article of Faith. In case it has been a while since you were in primary, here it is:

 9 We believe all that God has ^arevealed, all that He does now reveal, and we believe that He will yet ^breveal many great and important things pertaining to the Kingdom of God.

If you think that "many great and important things" can only be policy, then I would have to say that is an unnecessary limit on God's power.

"Women and men are different, but equal."

Yes. Women and men are different. But does that difference necessarily preclude them from the priesthood? People of different races are different, but that doesn't mean that our church doesn't benefit from people of all backgrounds having the priesthood.

The church even came out with some wonderful information about the revelation that extended the priesthood to all worthy males. You can read here about how the previous policy was likely limited by the prejudices of our mortality. To believe that our leaders make mistakes is not only in line with the teachings of President Uchtdorf, but resonates with our broader understanding that God is perfect, and humans are flawed.

With that in mind, it is easy to believe that God might not see the priesthood as inherently male, but this policy is a vestige of a culture that has repressed women for hundreds, if not thousands, of years. In just the last hundred years, women could not vote, could not own property, could not complain when her husband beat her, could not prosecute a man who raped her, could not go to college, could not get a job if she were married, and could not do so many other things that we take for granted today.

And when feminists called for these things to change, it was often other women who said these limits were necessary to womanhood. They would say, "It is not feminine to be disobedient to her husband when he feels the need to physically discipline her. It is not feminine to desire to vote because her husband can vote for her. It is not feminine to go to college because the only proper atmosphere for a woman is at home. To give women these powers would be to desecrate the God-given differences between men and women, and--of course--denigrate the family."

What we know now, is that giving women these rights has not only empowered women to be better mothers and family members, but has magnified the gifts unique to women. It is because of these differences that we need women bishops, women mission presidents, women apostles, and women prophets.

Until very recently, women weren't able to speak or pray in sacrament meeting or general conference, there were no prominent pictures of our current female church leaders displayed in church buildings, and there was no general conference session just for women every six months.  But these things have changed, showing us that our leaders are trying to fix some of the vestiges of a patriarchal culture.

Who knows what women will take for granted in 50 years. Perhaps it will be allowing women to hold clerical callings in the church, to act as a witness for ordinances in the temple, to take part in the blessing of their children, or even to hold the priesthood.

"If you understood the Gospel, you would know women's ordination isn't necessary."

This argument is awesome because it not only doesn't make sense, but instead of an insult to my intelligence/testimony, it is actually a compliment. You'll see why in a little bit.

First, I would just like to lay some groundwork for my position in the gospel. I have been to church nearly every Sunday of my entire life, I went to EFY five (yes, FIVE!) years, graduated from BYU with all the religion requirements, studied the Old and New Testament in Israel, am endowed, have done a pretty good job at weekly temple trips, and do my very best at morning and evening prayer/scripture study.

Not that these things will guarantee an understanding of the gospel. They won't. But, the best thing about the gospel is that it is designed to be simple. To bring it back to the Articles of Faith again:

We believe that the first principles and ordinances of the Gospel are: first, Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ; second, Repentance; third, Baptism by immersion for the remission of sins; fourth, Laying on of hands for the gift of the Holy Ghost.

Sure, repentance is a topic that can get into pretty deep waters, and faith is something that can be pretty stratified, but the best part about the gospel is that we have the Holy Ghost to fill in some gaps. Everyone has some aspect of the gospel that they don't fully understand. And if you think you don't, you just haven't given enough thought to some hard topics. But luckily, we have great examples in the scriptures of going to God directly with your questions and pleading for answers. Where would Joseph Smith be without James 1:5? Moses without going to the top of Sinai? Or Enos if he didn't wrestle before God?

In general conference, we learn that this kind of earnest answer-seeking is an essential part of eternal progression, and thus, the gospel:

“We cannot find Enos-like faith without our own wrestle before God in prayer. I testify that the reward is worth the effort. … I promise that if you do these things sincerely and unceasingly, the words Christ spoke to His disciples will be fulfilled in your life: ‘Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.’"

And another promise from the Savior:

 6 And blessed are all they who do hunger and thirst after righteousness, for they shall be filled with the Holy Ghost.


To me, it's pretty plain that we aren't meant to "understand" everything about the gospel. These gaps in our understanding are essential for our growth as individuals and as a church. So instead of insulting me, saying that I don't understand the gospel is just telling me that I'm closer to getting further light and knowledge. Or maybe already received some.

"I'm a woman and I don't even want the priesthood."

Since I have waxed long on some of the other answers, I will keep this one brief. Some men don't want the priesthood, does that mean all men should be precluded from it? The desire of some does not a barrier to others make.

"Women already have access to the priesthood."

God, in His infinite wisdom, has set up the church in a way that women and men can have access to a worthy priesthood leader when they need it. However, for a woman to request a blessing from a home teacher who might live miles and miles away in the middle of the night might be too much of an imposition to make of someone she might barely know.

And even if women without the priesthood in their homes have all the access they need to the priesthood, this ignores the fact that some of the blessings of the priesthood are found in the act of administering it.

Although I have listened to many testimony meetings where men testified of the blessings they have felt by being able to hold the priesthood, I think I will echo Paul's advice when he says:

to remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he said, It is more blessed to ^agive than to receive.

"It is sinful to ask for power and authority."

To ask for more knowledge is not only not sinful, but it is completely fundamental to our restored gospel. And to desire an ordinance of the gospel--specifically the ordination of the priesthood--is quite possibly the most righteous desire anyone can have. When a twelve year old boy is excited about being ordained a deacon, or preparing to receive the Melchizedek priesthood, we laud that behavior. Should it be any different for the women?

Furthermore, to plead with the leaders of the church for further revelation on this topic is even less threatening to the structure of the church. But when there have been multiple times in our history where the leaders of our church have received revelation that makes sweeping, fundamental changes, I cannot understand why some people get so threatened by the pleading.

I truly believe that every person on this earth was given certain gifts and experiences so that they can help advance God's plan, even if just in a small way. For me, I went through years of wondering how a God I know and love would create a church that seems to waste so many of the talents and gifts of women through leadership and full involvement in the Church.

But I have a deep-seated knowledge that this is God's church. No matter what I can't understand, I have not been able to deny that fact. And since this is God's church, I have a fervent hope that our church will continue to progress toward a zion-like community.

And messages like this from Bruce R. McConkie fan the fire of hope and remind me that I'm just where God wants me to be:

"I would like to say something about the new revelation relative to the priesthood going to those of all nations and races. “He [meaning Christ, who is the Lord God] inviteth them all to come unto him and partake of his goodness; and he denieth none that come unto him, black and white, bond and free, male and female; and he remembereth the heathen; and all are alike unto God, both Jew and Gentile” (2 Nephi 26:33).

"These words have now taken on a new meaning. We have caught a new vision of their true significance. This also applies to a great number of other passages in the revelations. Since the Lord gave this revelation on the priesthood, our understanding of many passages has expanded. Many of us never imagined or supposed that they had the extensive and broad meaning that they do have.

"...We get our truth and our light line upon line and precept upon precept. We have now had added a new flood of intelligence and light on this particular subject, and it erases all the darkness and all the views and all the thoughts of the past. They don’t matter any more.

"It doesn’t make a particle of difference what anybody ever said about the Negro matter before the first day of June of this year, 1978. It is a new day and a new arrangement, and the Lord has now given the revelation that sheds light out into the world on this subject. As to any slivers of light or any particles of darkness of the past, we forget about them. We now do what meridian Israel did when the Lord said the gospel should go to the Gentiles. We forget all the statements that limited the gospel to the house of Israel, and we start going to the Gentiles."

I feel so blessed to be a part of a church that is attuned to the changing church, and adjusting to our needs. Thank you for reading this post, and please remember to be open to the Spirit, and to treat your brothers and sisters--no matter what they believe--with the love and respect Christ has for them.

Father's Day, Fatherhood, and Why Women Should Have the Priesthood

I might not be the only one, but ever since this last Sunday, I have been thinking a lot about fathers.

I have been incredibly lucky to have a really great father. I know a lot of you are under the impression that your dad is the greatest but -- and there is no easy way to say this -- well, you are wrong. My dad is.

I remember many late nights where my dad would stay up playing Pretty Little Princess with us. If any of you don't know what Pretty Little Princess is, you need to get your hands on a time machine, go back to 1992 and get in on this action. It was basically monopoly but instead of buying boring things like properties and houses, you earned fabulous sterling-plastic clip-on earrings, luxurious cubic zirconium beaded necklaces, and of course the petrochemical golden crown inlaid with sticker gems.

My dad also was such a good dad that he once bought me what I'm pretty sure was lingerie from a yard sale because I wanted it for dress up. And don't even get me started on how awesome his bed time stories were about when he was a little girl with long golden curls and a white pony.

In case it wasn't obvious, my dad raised all girls. So even though braiding and Barbie-playing didn't come natural to him, he still indulged us because he knew it would make us happy. Because he knows his daughters.

I can't imagine our Heavenly Father is any different. While none of us remember exactly what our Heavenly Father is like, it is safe to say that He possesses all the qualities that we know and love in our earthly fathers.  And since I know how great my own dad is, I love talking about fathers and their eternal roles in the family.

Which is why I love Father's Day.

On Father's Day we get to focus on the abiding gifts that men are able to develop and use as they progress to become Heavenly Fathers themselves. And since men and women are equal partners in the eternal scheme of things, I think men are often pushed out of the spotlight when we speak of raising children.

Don't get me wrong, mothers are absolutely fantastic. I miss my mom everyday and am so grateful for all the mothering I got. She instilled in me a great love of people, learning, and--most of all--good food. But I wouldn't have become the person I am today without both the love from my father and my mother. This is because being a father is more than just being a provider and a priesthood holder. The fact that my father holds the priesthood only enhances his roles as a spiritual patriarch of our family. But  this does not mean that priesthood is a complementary binary to motherhood.

Any toddler who has taken a bath with siblings, cousins, neighbors (gasp! yes. The level of required familiarity for bathing was on the lower side for toddlers in the Thomas household) knows that boys and girls are made differently. And, without going into too much detail about the birds and the bees, it is safe to say that women's role in bringing children into this world is a bit more intense. Because of that, it is often implied that women are inherently the more intense parents.

But I think this is a seriously flawed way of looking at our roles as parents, and ultimately the roles of our Heavenly Parents. And since the Prophet Joseph Smith taught that "If men do not comprehend the character of God, they do not comprehend themselves" (TPJS, p. 343) this kind of pondering is well worth the mental exertion. So just because the woman cooks the baby, it does not mean that she holds a more emphatic role as a parent. In fact, if that were true, Heavenly Mother must be a more significant parent than Heavenly Father. This is a point I don't think many would be willing to concede.

Comparing motherhood to the priesthood is a bit like comparing apples and doorknobs. Or doughnuts and taxes. One does not replace the other, or even act as the other's counterpart. LDS.org defines the priesthood as "The authority and power that God gives to man to act in all things for the salvation of man."

Some of you might point out the first "man" in that sentence as clearly something that is meant strictly for men. But if we use "man" as referring to specifically the group of people who possess both an X and a Y chromosome, then priesthood only allows for the salvation of that same specific group. Now if we use "man" as referring to all people regardless of gender -- as, alas, we so often do -- then it means that priesthood is not only nonspecific to the masculine gender, but isn't even specific to fatherhood.  

Now imagine a family where both mother and father can be examples of worthy priesthood holders. Or where a stay at home mom is able to give her child a priesthood blessing if a medical emergency comes up. Priesthood wouldn't supplant the roles of motherhood, just like it doesn't take away from the roles of fatherhood.

I know that women having the priesthood would be different. And some of you are probably even thinking of stronger words than "different," but isn't that good?! We believe that God will prepare us "line upon line, precept upon precept," so why should anyone expect that we have already received every revelation we need? Should we call up President Monson and tell him that he can retire? Because if we don't believe in ongoing revelation then we have no need for God's mouthpiece on earth. And while you're at it, let's rescind every change that God has ever mandated for this earth.

But you can't do that. Because everything God has created for us has been about progression and building upon things that are already good and true, starting with the separation of the light from the dark. So not only should we expect things to change, but we should be open and excited for the changes! After all, who knows how long Adam was out and about naming things before God made Eve. I'm sure Adam didn't complain about that change improvement.

So instead of seeing women's ordination as changing the church, think of it as adding to the truths that we already have.

Receiving the sacred ordination of the priesthood would only enhance the unique gifts each mother brings to her family, but it would do more than that. If both women and men were to hold the priesthood then we wouldn't have to pretend like women should hold a higher parenting role than men do.

If you believe in a Heavenly Father and Mother who love, nurture, and guide equally, then it only makes sense that our earthly roles should prepare us for that. I love both my heavenly and my earthly fathers and am so grateful for the roles they play in my life.

Paris... of the West

DISCLAIMER: When I was uploading pics from my camera to my dear old mac, something happened which I thought only happened to other people -- the pictures DISAPPEARED! Seriously. Okay, not all of them, but all of the best ones! Of course I still have random pictures that I took from the LaQuinta in Cheyenne, WY but about every third photo vanished. So after pouting to Jason for the better part of an hour, and verbally abusing my computer/camera, I have put on a stiff upper lip and decided to post the pictures I do have. In other words, I hope you have really low standards for this post.

As of last week, Jason and I have become Parisians.

In a way.

Last year, Jason and I decided we wanted to get out of Utah and take a little adventure. I hadn't gone on a study abroad for over a year and was just itching to get out of the 801.

SECOND DISCLAIMER: I really love Utah. I love the people, the landscape, the temples, the grid-system, the fry-sauce, everything. I really can't say enough good things about Utah. And if you say anything negative about it expect to hear an angry tirade with the phrases, "greatest snow on earth," "zion," and the definitive "this is the place" multiple times.

That being said, I am a creature who thrives on change. Consequently, growing up in one city for the majority of my formative years, going to college there, and then going to more college there is just a little much. I want to explore. We decided that since Jason is a much more marketable individual, he would apply for internships during the summer and we would just go wherever the wind would take us. Except we had ruled out the extremely-rural winds. We wanted an adventure, but not an episode of The Simple Life.

Hank's fav position: breathing in my face.

When Jason was offered an internship in Cincinnati helping professional athletes put on summer sports camps, we were all for it. Then, whenever I was too sick of editing diet pill articles at work, I would look up things about our soon-to-be-home. Did you know Cincinnati has the 4th most accessible parks in the nation? Well, you do now. And, more importantly, Cincinnati was dubbed "The Paris of the West" because of its exceptional architecture.

Guilty picture of Hank after he whined the. whole. night. long. in Cheyenne.

Now that we are out here, I must admit it is amazing. While it cannot rival the beautiful Wasatch front, Jason is so happy to be back in a place that is green again. Apparently the thriving populations of sage brush and tumbleweed in Utah don't do it for Oregonians. But the riverfront is so fun, the downtown is one of the cleanest I've ever seen, there are beautiful, old homes everywhere we go, and our apartment is 18 minutes from everywhere. Seriously -- a geographical oddity.

Beautiful Bella, the goldendoodle of Omaha.

It is definitely an adventure, though. Our apartment is on the border of two very different neighborhoods. One is absolutely gorgeous and full of well-manicured, historic homes. The other is less so. The Kroger in that neighborhood has full-time police escorts, and there have been multiple prostitute sightings. The drive shaft in our car just happened to break off (just a couple blocks before we got on the freeway #tendermercy) in that sketchy area and let's just say we wished we had Hank to be our chaperone.

We also did some pretty cool things before we got to Cincinnati.

For my birthday Jason got us a gourmet cooking experience.
That fire was intended. Double chin was not. 

It was a monumental birthday for Jason! He turned 24 on April 24th and so I forced him to have a golden birthday party.

He also rented a puppy. Because he is perfect.

It was mainly an excuse to eat good food while outside -- Jason's favorite things! -- but we even had an appearance from a real-live hobbit!

I was really happy.

But I had just gone to the dentist, so I was having trouble expressing the right emotions.

Also, we got to eat gold cake for weeks since I made multiple practice cakes because I'm kind of neurotic.

After the third leg of our drive out to the great Mid-West, we stopped in Chicago and had a little time to explore the more dog-friendly parts of the windy city. Let's just say you would never know how many wild bunnies there are in Millenium park before you are walking around with a born predator tied to your wrist. Somehow Jason and I managed to keep our arms attached to our body. Loose-leash walking is a myth and anyone who tells you otherwise is just trying to make you feel like a bad dog-owner.

Pretending to be Cubs fans. Except for Marin, who is a legitimate fan because she looks great in all Cubs gear.

Then I was a really terrible wife and let Jason go on to Cincinnati by himself while I had a weekend with some of my best friends from my London study abroad.

We don't mess around when it comes to food.

So many good things happened as a result of that study abroad -- like starting this dear old blog -- but the absolute best thing was the people I met there.

So hard to get a decent pic from a stranger.
As we learned very well in London.

I still can't believe what a miracle it was that we could have 16+ girls share one bathroom and we would not only still like each other by the end of 4 months, but we would love each other so much that we come together from all different parts of the country to laugh at the same jokes, eat bucket loads of calories, and go through anthropologie and J-Crew sales racks like there is no tomorrow.

Vegetarian hot dog.

Real hot dog.

Seriously, though. Fall, 2008 was the most magical 27 Palace Court has ever been. I know there are many from other semesters who would beg to differ, but I just don't know how semesters like ours could happen twice.

So much love.

Those who weren't there were dearly, dearly missed. Just keep putting that money aside for when we all go back to London together. I've already packed my nighties!

Oh and here's a bonus pic of me being really embarrassing to reward you for making it to the end of this really long post:

Party like the Oscars

If anyone knows anything about me, it's that I like to party.

And by party, I mean eat fancy food, wear fancy clothes, be with cool people, eat more fancy food, spill fancy food on your fancy clothes, and wrap it all up by midnight.

I know. I'm pretty hardcore.

So when my invitation to the Oscars went missing (somehow I think it is related to sequestration...) I thought we had to bring the Oscars to Provo. After all, the only thing better than beautiful celebrities in all their fineries is a bunch of Mormons in old prom dresses chowing down after a long day of fasting.

The best thing about living in my dad's basement -- besides the free rent and reliable heat -- is a TV with plenty of seating. In our last house we had our TV in what we called "The Dark Room," because it had no windows. But it was also small enough that when we put our couch facing the TV there was not enough room to play the Kinect. And since you know I've got to get my Dance Central on, that just wasn't an option.

Poor Jason realizing we didn't have enough room  by breaking the light fixture. With his head. On our second night in the house.

So, we did the only other sensible thing and we positioned our couch so it faced a blank wall. While that left us room to shake our groove thang, it meant we had to do all of our TV watching from pillows on the ground. Even though this set an awesome, ethnic mood, we had a max capacity of about 4 people for TV-watching unless you weren't afraid of non-spousal-spooning.

But to get back to our Oscars party... my dad's basement not only has enough room for classic family room fixtures like an air hockey table, darts, and something that involves basketballs, but also plenty of people to enjoy the Oscars without bursting their personal boundary bubbles. There's even room for defunct exercise equipment! Yay!

We took advantage of all this space and invited some of our favorite people to watch the festivities with us in their black-tie-finest. To make sure they didn't feel out of place in their haberdashery we laid out the red carpet and set the celeb mood.

 

 

Seriously. I dare US Weekly to pick a worst dressed from these people. They are all pretty stunning.

Apart from sparkling conversation, my favorite part of any party is the food. Initially I wanted to take this opportunity to make only food that is fancy and really hard to pronounce, but since no one likes to eat that kind of food except me, I stuck with more traditional appetizers and just tried to fancy pants them up.

I made buffalo chicken strips with blue cheese dressings and celery shavings, fried chicken and waffles, smoked BBQ pork sliders on brioche buns, garlic parmesan popcorn, pear and pecan gorgonzola salad, brie and peach crostinis, chocolate peanut butter cake balls, and white chocolate marionberry cake balls. We also had delicious homemade oreo cookies, brownies, and a full mocktail spread brought by delightful guests.

Since the Oscars can be kind of boring, especially when you are on the media slow track and waiting for movies to come to the dollar theater, we had bingo sheets to keep people interested. Congrats to Hanna for winning the illustrious $10 iTunes gift card for getting the first bingo!

Jason always stresses out when I tell him about the parties I'm planning because he knows that there will be at least one or two freak-outs in the ensuing days when I clean the house from top to bottom in the middle of the night. Or I will spend hours cutting and taping logos to make a backdrop. Or dipping and breading endless chicken pieces. Or jumbling words for bingo.

But he has now realized that he can't fight it any longer. I only have two speeds: turbo or hibernation.



So thank you everyone who made this Oscars party unforgettable.

Protecting Yourself From Sadness

8 years ago today my mom died. And 8 years ago I started feeling sorry for myself.

Even though I don't necessarily think it is natural for my personality, I kind of started seeing myself as some sort of victim. In class when we would be reading some book where a kid's parent dies, I always thought everyone was looking at me, or in church when we would talk about eternal families, I was sure that the teacher was sending side-long glances at me as if to silently tell me, "You know this lesson is for you, right?"

I've never liked being a victim; in fact, I don't even really like it when people hold the door open for me. I like to do things myself, I don't like to feel pitied and I don't like to feel like I am being looked down on. But for some reason, ever since I became this little half-orphan, I kind of expected it.

When I was going to Prom the first time I remembered thinking that people probably felt sorry for me that I didn't have a doting mother to help me find a dress or do my hair or take a thousand pictures that I would pretend to be embarrassed about but secretly adore.

Or when I went away to a different country for 4 months and I didn't have anyone to tell me how much they missed me and wanted me back home, I started to feel sorry for myself. Started telling myself that even though everyone didn't know my situation, they would pity me if they did.

And then I started being proud of my unfortunate self. "Look at me, I'm adopted and I planned my own wedding without a mom." "Yeah, I'm the only one in my family with brown eyes, but I still got into college." "Aren't you impressed that I didn't breastfeed and yet I'm still a fully-functioning adult?"


As embarrassed as I am to say this, it really wasn't until tonight that I realized what a complete idiot I've been.

A year ago I read the book Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close. Buy it. You'll love it. And I did love it. But I think I had so much on my mind a year ago that I couldn't really give the book my full attention, although I did remember the quote that says, "you cannot protect yourself from sadness, without protecting yourself from happiness."

If you haven't seen the movie/read the book, I'll give you a little teaser and just tell you it's about a kid who lost his dad on 9/11 and goes all over New York looking for clues from him and during the process, he meets all different people and learns about so many different lives.

Tonight, as we were watching the movie, I finally realized why my mom died. It's not so that I could prove to myself and everyone around me that I could grow up without a mom, it's not so that my dad can hit golfballs alone in the garage, it's not so that my little sister could grow up largely ignored and my older sister could have three beautiful children without a mom to brag about them for her.

It's just because that's life.

Life is good and bad! Being sad didn't make me unique, in fact it's the opposite--feeling sadness is the deepest connection we have with each other. There are happy times and there are sad times because without the sad we can't have the happy. Just like on a swing, you can't have your very best time at the peak of your swing without being at the very bottom. The good and the bad is what makes us human! It's what we all share with each other! The fact that we can let people both in our lives and out of it is the absolute best part of life!

I left the dinky old dollar theater absolutely in love with all of humanity and feeling so in tune with the human experience. Even though I didn't lose anyone in 9/11, I still feel a huge loss and deeply connected to those people. Just like my heart breaks when I see homeless people coughing at a bus stop, or an old person alone at a restaurant.

I love being sad because I love being happy! Each day is a miracle and each person in this world is miraculous!

The main criticism that Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close the movie got was that it was overly sentimental and a melodrama. As is this post.

Are You There Blogger? It's Me, Alex...

Usually, when I don't blog for almost a year, I start the rebirth post with a sappy "Forgive me blogger for I have sinned, it has been yada yada days since my last post..." type of apology to the anonymous blogging world and, of course, an iron-clad promise that I'll do better next time.

But I decided I'm not going to do that today. Instead, I'm going to start with a silent pat on my own back and a "you're welcome" to absolutely no one in particular.

Although I'm not going to apologize, I do feel like I have to do somewhat of a recap of the last... 8 months? that I've been ignoring this blog. Plus, I just did my annual camera to computer picture upload so I've suddenly got all these memories that I have to archive.

P.S. these will not be done in chronological order because I'm not a machine.

I made one of the most platypus-like faces known to mankind. Oh, I also ran a marathon.

We watched the most epic, and last, installment of the Harry Potter movies. Stay tuned for when Jordyn Canady and I remake the whole series into movies that actually do the books justice!

I went on a honeymoon! Of which this is one of the only pictures. Since I can't fully document it I'll just say, it was beautiful, we got tan and ate a lot of beans.

Our honeymoon tour spanned from Provo to Phoenix to Mazatlan to Portland to Island Park to Provo and since Jason's mom was nice enough to load us up with a ton of house stuffs, we had a most epic Budget truck ride from Portland on. Jason is pictured because he did most of the driving.

We celebrated my third favorite holiday with a totally legit pumpkin carving fest. Thanks to some overachiever on pinterest, we even carved SANDVIK in the back of it.

We were murderers!!! Well we went to a murder mystery party anyway. My character was this awesome heiress who was also a bootleg driver who knew how to handle a Tommy-gun. Jason was a sexy gambler who ran the bootlegging business. Needless to say, our characters also had a steamy romance.

We got a Kinect and Jason got a little too competitive and completely smashed the light fixture. With his head. So we spent one of our first nights in our new house cleaning up glass off the carpet and out of Jason's flesh.

 Oh, and I got married to my favorite person.

 Which is most likely the best thing that's ever happened to me.

BYU's Too Awesome

Sometimes I think I'm just too lucky to be able to go to BYU. The cup of hilarious BYU students just runneth over. One little instance of hilarity was revealed to me today when I was introduced to a man in my 322 class named Stetson. Then I was surprised to see the same young man in my 325 class. But, now here's the twist, he introduced himself as Drake!

Now I know what you're all thinking: we're at an accredited University where people are mature enough not to need pseudonyms--he's probably just another white guy (they all look alike). But he's not! And I can prove it.

Reasons why I know he's the same guy:

He's got a ton of visible moles, and I'm very sure the constellations match up.

Same wedding ring (first thing I noticed because Stetson/Drake is about as hot as male editing minors get)

He lays down the same genre of "witty" teacher/student comments.

Then laughs too loudly at all his own "jokes."

He also sits in the most uncool seat in the room in both classes. The one that's closest to the teacher's podium.

But even if it is two different people, this Drake/Stetson situation has reminded me how awesome it is to be in college and get a fresh start with new and different people all the time. Every semester you get new classes, new wards where you can be a new you! Why shouldn't you be able to be a Stetson on MWF and Drake on TTh? And maybe I'll even hit up my American Lit class with what I like to call a British accent?

Pray For The Peace Of Jerusalem

Pictures! I hope everyone enjoys this visual stimulus brought to you by the wireless at Hebrew University (the internet at our center is a little too junior to be able to withstand pictures being uploaded).This is the view from the center on our first free day. As you can see, I was pretty excited to have been out on the town.

This is me showing the Dome of the Rock like it's something you can win on Price Is Right.

At the Ethiopian Church where a man of the cloth came up to me, kissed both of my cheeks, hugged me, and then proceeds to spray my entire body (including both of the cameras in my hands) with this Oriental perfume.

This last week we were able to go to the Western Wall for the ushering in of Shabbat (after sundown, which is strictly contraband under regular circumstances) and it was tov to the max! The whole place was packed with old Jewish women who looked like they stepped out of a European cafe in the 50's, even older men who covered their bald spots with kippas, packs of Hebrew school students with scriptures that opened the wrong way, and (my personal favorite) hordes of Israeli soldiers much too beautiful to be enlisted.

From the Ultra-Orthodox Jews down to the observant gentiles, we all had our own way of communicating with God. After standing in front of the wall and just absorbing all the reverence from the wide spectrum of worship, I finally wrote down my prayer and as I pressed it between the prayers of hundreds of others from all over the world I felt so spiritually connected with this little world full of people looking for something to make them happy. Awesome.