Are You There Blogger? It's Me, Alex...

Usually, when I don't blog for almost a year, I start the rebirth post with a sappy "Forgive me blogger for I have sinned, it has been yada yada days since my last post..." type of apology to the anonymous blogging world and, of course, an iron-clad promise that I'll do better next time.

But I decided I'm not going to do that today. Instead, I'm going to start with a silent pat on my own back and a "you're welcome" to absolutely no one in particular.

Although I'm not going to apologize, I do feel like I have to do somewhat of a recap of the last... 8 months? that I've been ignoring this blog. Plus, I just did my annual camera to computer picture upload so I've suddenly got all these memories that I have to archive.

P.S. these will not be done in chronological order because I'm not a machine.

I made one of the most platypus-like faces known to mankind. Oh, I also ran a marathon.

We watched the most epic, and last, installment of the Harry Potter movies. Stay tuned for when Jordyn Canady and I remake the whole series into movies that actually do the books justice!

I went on a honeymoon! Of which this is one of the only pictures. Since I can't fully document it I'll just say, it was beautiful, we got tan and ate a lot of beans.

Our honeymoon tour spanned from Provo to Phoenix to Mazatlan to Portland to Island Park to Provo and since Jason's mom was nice enough to load us up with a ton of house stuffs, we had a most epic Budget truck ride from Portland on. Jason is pictured because he did most of the driving.

We celebrated my third favorite holiday with a totally legit pumpkin carving fest. Thanks to some overachiever on pinterest, we even carved SANDVIK in the back of it.

We were murderers!!! Well we went to a murder mystery party anyway. My character was this awesome heiress who was also a bootleg driver who knew how to handle a Tommy-gun. Jason was a sexy gambler who ran the bootlegging business. Needless to say, our characters also had a steamy romance.

We got a Kinect and Jason got a little too competitive and completely smashed the light fixture. With his head. So we spent one of our first nights in our new house cleaning up glass off the carpet and out of Jason's flesh.

 Oh, and I got married to my favorite person.

 Which is most likely the best thing that's ever happened to me.

BYU's Too Awesome

Sometimes I think I'm just too lucky to be able to go to BYU. The cup of hilarious BYU students just runneth over. One little instance of hilarity was revealed to me today when I was introduced to a man in my 322 class named Stetson. Then I was surprised to see the same young man in my 325 class. But, now here's the twist, he introduced himself as Drake!

Now I know what you're all thinking: we're at an accredited University where people are mature enough not to need pseudonyms--he's probably just another white guy (they all look alike). But he's not! And I can prove it.

Reasons why I know he's the same guy:

He's got a ton of visible moles, and I'm very sure the constellations match up.

Same wedding ring (first thing I noticed because Stetson/Drake is about as hot as male editing minors get)

He lays down the same genre of "witty" teacher/student comments.

Then laughs too loudly at all his own "jokes."

He also sits in the most uncool seat in the room in both classes. The one that's closest to the teacher's podium.

But even if it is two different people, this Drake/Stetson situation has reminded me how awesome it is to be in college and get a fresh start with new and different people all the time. Every semester you get new classes, new wards where you can be a new you! Why shouldn't you be able to be a Stetson on MWF and Drake on TTh? And maybe I'll even hit up my American Lit class with what I like to call a British accent?

Dear Blogosphere

Every time I miss an entry in my journal I feel like I have to apologize and give an explanation for why I deprived the inanimate pages of my journal with the intimate touch of my pen, (e.g. "I'm sorry I didn't write last night, Clueless was on tbs again last night, and even though it was 2am and I still had beaucoup de french homework and some facebooking to do, it was a small price to pay to the party gods...") and I feel similar remorse to the blogging world. And because there are about the same amount of people who read my blog as do my journal, plus or minus a few, (yes, this is a shoutout to my reader in Brisbane, Australia--thank you google analytics) this apology will be just as contrite and mildly repentant as the one my little journal gets every few weeks: Sorry.
But, let's talk about a little baby my lovely roommate Jordyn and I have concocted.
The World is Our Campus
Yes. It is a second blog.
Yes. I realize I can barely blog on the one.
No. You can't live another day without reading it.
We are not trying to be cynical. BYU is just too much of a goldmine for hilarious observations not to take advantage of it on the blogosphere. Anyone who's ever been to BYU at one point in their life, known anyone who's ever been to BYU at one point in their life, or just observed Mormons in their natural habitat can relate.
So please enjoy, and tell all your friends.

Philosophy, Shmilosophy

So after spending about an hour trying to read Nicomachean Ethics of Aristotle (and by "trying" I mean staring at a lot of little black circles and lines while letting my mind formulate its own philosophical questions like: What color was my retainer in third grade? Do I eat enough fiber? If I learned the "Single Ladies" music video, would Beyonce be my best friend?) I've finally come to the conclusion that sometimes school is hard, just to be hard. I don't think my professors really believe that someone in the professional world will ask me how Aristotle cured Polio (I still haven't finished the reading), and I probably will never think about this text again once I take the test. 

With 19 credits and a huge tendency to procrastinate, I spend a fair amount of my time looking like this little girl. But at least I know I'm not the only one in the world. In one of my classes I was engaging in one of my favorite pastimes: Laptop Spying; when I stumbled across a real gem of a note-taker. This student provides full commentary to the boring bullet points our professor provides. Commentary like "I wonder if this guy in front of me knows how bad he's sweating" and "Never eat Taco Bell before another 3 hr evening class again" keeps going to class worthwhile. But the first thing that drew my prying eye to his MacBook screen was this:

WHY AM I HERE???! 

I don't even know who Jeffrey (original spelling) Chaucer is, much less how the black plague influenced his ideas on the aristocracy!

Thank you. Thank you God for letting me know that not everyone at BYU was born writing thesis statements in MLA format while playing a piano concerto they wrote while they were helping the orphans in Somalia. There are some mortals out there. Even if we're too afraid to admit that we don't keep our Organic Chemistry textbook to use as reading material for that next plane ride we have to our prestigious internship in Washington DC to anyone but a Word document, it's OK. There are dozens of us, DOZENS!